End to a crazy Monday at "A" high school. You know its going to be a crazy day when you see students being picked up by their parents with eyes filled with tears, students running out the bathroom cursing like no other about "who knows what" and, when your next door neighbor has already written a "blue slip (disciplinary action form)" by 11:15 in the morning.
Mondays are always a little crazy. I have students who are extremely tired or are too excited to stay in their seats. I know you just asked yourself, "excited"? Apparently at the high school I work at, many students despise their own home. They rather be at school with their friends. Students do not receive the attention they ought to receive at home. They rather not be at home where anger, animosity, confusion, frustration, and restlessness or even neglect reside. They are woken up by yelling voices and broken glasses or they are sleepless because of constant spell of loneliness and worthlessness. Home may not always be the safest place for these children. So, they come to school. Attendance is not ever an issue for these students. I will see them everyday at school. They will participate but they like to place themselves on the disruptive end of the spectrum. How do good children turn into delinquents (my lifelong question....)?
I administered the first chapter test in my beginning level class today. I asked one of my students, who may fall under the above mentioned category to summarize their thoughts on the test. He insisted that he failed. I asked him if he's failing all of his classes and not to my surprise, his answer was, yes. I asked him why, knowing that it is a rhetorical question. I'm sure he really doesn't know why he fails, has low self esteem, and low self expectation.
His answer to me was, "because I don't do my homework."
I asked him if his parents ever ask him anything about his homework or school work in general.
He insisted as he walked out the door, "My parents are too busy with their work, they don't care how I do in school or what I'm doing. They don't even care to know if I'm at school right nor or not. So, why should I care about anything here at school. It wouldn't even matter......"
Another girl in my class who had also heard what was mentioned said, "I will still do it anyways. I want to be somewhere better than I am now. I'll try and do my best to put myself in a better place."
What is the difference between these two students?
Self respect? Self expectation? Amount of attention they receive? Their level of self ambition? The way they perceive their future? or maybe just, their desires..
If the boy was pushed by his mother, sister, his girlfriend, or even a teacher to do better because they care; will he do better? I am sure he will. He lacks organizational skills along with note taking skills. He had never acquired the need to pay attention for key words and insights that the teacher is providing. He lacks basic skills to be educated and learn because he had never needed to acquire any of it. He has always been the failing student that sat in the corner of the room. All of this may be true but can also be changed. He doesn't have to be the student in the corner that is picked on. His self image must be revisited and his mental capacity must be re-challenged. Anything and everything will click in students' minds when and if "it all makes sense" to them. The stars of academia have to line up for him. But before all of this happens, everything will NEED to MATTER. It may not matter to his parents but it does in reality for him. He needs to understand that he is loved. There are people who cares. His existence does make a dramatic impact on the lives around him. If he knew this from the depth of his heart, I know for a fact that he will be compelled to change for the better (in totality). He matters hence, what he does also matters.
The big question, what is my role as a teacher?
What can I do and what should I do to help an underachieving student understand that they have the power within to achieve anything they want...
I should never give up on anyone and anything that I Love.
